Changed. Our Call To Adopt Part 4

The weeks leading up to our departure were filled with gathering donations for the HOH, orphanages, and the street kids. We had no idea what this trip would mean for us in the long term but we knew that God had something more for us then just the adoption of our son. We knew we wouldn't come back the same yet we weren't sure what that would look like. This was our first trip to Africa and we were both SO excited.

We were scheduled to leave on Super Bowl Sunday - we watched the game since I'd packed our bags days before. It was a great time to relax with the kids and our friends who had walked out our adoption with us, the ups and downs were very much understood. My friend Sarah was planning on taking us to the airport and my mother in law had flown in from Oregon to stay with the kids. We said our goodbyes at the house and off to the airport we went.

Giddy would be an understatement. It reminded me of the drive to the hospital each time I gave birth. This drive was just REALLY long and it happened to be a plane ride instead. The labor of love that looked like a whole pile of paperwork was behind us, our new son awaited us and our hearts were full as we reflected on all the Lord had done to get us to this point.

Arriving in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia was surreal. It was late and all we could see were people and the lights from the cars. We arrived at our guest house exhausted but running on adrenaline. I wanted sleep to come quickly so I could wake up and get to my boy as quickly as possible. The next morning we ate breakfast and met another family also waiting to get their daughter. Friends we had no idea would share the gift of meeting our children for the first time and how that binds you together. When our driver arrived we pummeled him with questions, quickly learning how much he loved our son and how much love and time he had invested in our precious boy. My eyes teared up as he talked about his personality and how he taught him songs and bible verses.

When we pulled into the compound I spotted Silas immediately. Ephrim shouted out "Baby ciao your mommy and daddy are here"! That little boy sprinted like nothing I've ever seen, he was in my arms before we even had the chance to get out of the car let alone get a camera ready. He started talking and asking questions expecting me to understand his every word. David was snapping pictures as quickly as he could, our new friends realizing this was THE moment took the camera from him. It was amazing and surreal, the beginning of our life together.

Our time in Ethiopia was incredible. I remember feeling so overwhelmed yet thrilled to be there. When we went to Silas' orphanage it was so tough to see all of the precious faces who desperately needed families. One little girl found my leg, I lifted her undiapered little self into my arms I melted. I remember looking at David and we both knew we'd return some day for our daughter.

We had been changed. Our hearts would never be the same. How could we ever forget what we'd seen? The people of Ethiopia forever etched in our hearts. We had not only fallen in love with a precious boy, we'd fallen in love with a culture, a people, a country. Now that we'd seen we could not ignore.

We boarded the plane headed home with our new son in our arms, our other children waiting on the other side of the world. Wondering what God had for us next, completely willing to do whatever He asked.

Our family was forever impacted by the process of adoption. By a small boy at the wee age of three. Someone so small, carrying a huge story, a regular American family fighting to bring their son home. United. Forever.

To God Be The Glory!!

As we wait on the Lord for His perfect timing in bringing our daughter home a new story is being written. We are blessed, humbled, and honored to be on this adoption road again.

I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him.
---1 Samuel 1:27

Patience. Our Call To Adopt. Part 3

In the middle of the layoff we learned of a small boy with a story that leveled us. Biological adopted cousins that lived near us and an amazing Ethiopian family that loved him first. We were asked if we were open to an "older" child as in older then we'd requested. We were. This little guy was almost three but we couldn't be officially matched until his paperwork was completed so we had to wait.

With the start of a new job, the submission of our dossier, and school under way we settled in for the wait. In my head I figured we'd be matched quickly and soon we'd know for sure that this child we only knew as "baby" (the nickname he was given at the HOH) was our son. Deep inside we already knew but there was that hint of unknown that didn't let my heart go there. Okay so honestly I would have been devastated if the little boy I'd seen in a tiny picture from a traveling family wasn't our son. We were in love. David had always said he was sure we were getting a three year old despite our age range. When he saw the picture of this precious boy he KNEW this was our son.

It was eight of the longest weeks of my life waiting for THE call. (yes I know many of you have waited WAY longer, I know I know but for me it was tough especially since we knew about this little guy and knew he'd been waiting for a family for SO long) The call that changed our lives. The call that let us know Esubalew Yisak was to be our son. The call we had longed for. We immediately said YES to our referral. We didn't need to see paperwork, we knew this little man was our son. It didn't matter what the paperwork said. Looking at his precious face was surreal, showing our kids their brother for the first time is a memory I'll never forget. They were in love. We all were. We couldn't wait to bring our boy home.

We were given a January 14, 2008 court date just six days after our referral. We passed court the first time through, we rejoiced as Esubalew Yisak was now Esubalew David Shubin. Our son. We had paid all of our fees up to this point but we were short a few thousand. We went to the Lord with our needs, we felt like we'd exhausted everything. The new job didn't have a bonus program so that was out. My precious sister in law did a little fund raiser through her online newsletter to help cover some of our in country costs, it was such an incredible blessing to see people coming together to support us. People that didn't even know us. She challenged all of her readers to give $5. Many of them did. I'll never forget the impact that had on us as we watched each $5 donation add up. Those donations would pay for our visas to get into Ethiopia and our meals.

We had no idea how we were going to cover the cost of the plane tickets. We just didn't have it. Later that week we got a statement from the old company that Davids 401K needed to be rolled over or dealt with. We hadn't even thought about that wee asset. The Lord called us in this particular journey to give it all up and trust Him. We asked if that meant even our 401k? (please anyone reading this, do not think that means in order to adopt you have to cash out your 401K, I'm not saying that. I'm saying that's what the Lord put on our hearts) David had only been with the company for 2.5 years so there wasn't a huge amount in the account. However it was ample for what we needed. We sought the Lord and asked for direction. Both of us felt the Lord asking us to trust him with everything. So we did what many people in this world would call CRAZY and we cashed out that account. Our travel would be paid for. We didn't have any leftovers, we didn't have any excess but we had enough. God is SO good.

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Philipians 4:19

Sweet Surrender. Our Call To Adopt. Part 2.

Just two days after committing to adopt and taking the house off the market the phone rang. (Remember the car accident?) It was our lawyer. A settlement had been reached, they had fought the good fight, we didn't owe $10,000 as the insurance company had initially said, instead we were getting a decent chunk of change for medical bills, damages, as well as pain and suffering. I had a specified amount and each of the kids had a specified amount based on the severity of injury. My portion was almost 1/2 the cost of an international adoption. Only God. As I shared our story with the paralegal on the phone we both cried tears of Joy. She loved Jesus too and to see His provision was incredible for both of us.

Part of what the Lord used to bring us to the decision to adopt was Skyler. He wanted a brother in the worst way. He had cried when Olivia was born because he was convinced it was going to be a boy. He wanted to name her Quarter because it seemed more of a boy name to him. It took a long time before he was okay with her instead of a brother. That longing never went away. He begged us on a regular basis to give him a brother. He prayed for a brother, he planned what he would do with a brother, he tried to reason with us on why he should have a brother. It was a no brainer when our agency asked what we would be requesting. A boy 10-20 months anticipating we'd get a two year old.

As a family we knew 1/2 of our costs were covered but how in the world would we come up with the other half? We didn't have $12,000 laying around and we surely didn't know where it was going to come from. We also knew our time line was going to be quick, we were a pilot family for our agency and it was a new program that was likely to move swiftly. Plus boys were less desired (still breaks my heart to think of that) and there was only one family ahead of us requesting a toddler boy. We prayed as a family for God to show up in a BIG way.

Sometime later that week our two oldest children came to us saying they knew they had money in their savings account and they wanted to give all of it towards the adoption of their brother. Touched by their heart, their generosity, and love for a small boy they didn't know we thanked them but said it was okay they didn't have to spend their money. As David and I prayed over our kids we realized how much damage we would do if we didn't let them walk out their faith in this way. The next day we told them we'd absolutely let them give but only if it was really what they felt the Lord wanted them to do. They were both so sure. By this time Olivia had been watching all of this play out and also said she didn't want her money, she wanted to give it for her little brother too. As a family we prayed for our son/brother and this single act is truly what I believe the Lord used to bind our hearts as one in unity pushing forward to bring our sixth family member home. We were still short a fair amount of money but we knew the Lord would provide in His perfect timing.

September 2007 - David was laid off from his job.

My world fell apart. How could God allow this? We were walking out what He'd called us to do. Weren't we? We'd given up our dream house, Starbucks, new furniture, vacations, and more. What could He be thinking? Our dossier was going to be submitted as soon as we got our I-171H which could be any day. Why now? What good could possibly come from this? I knew we were close. I could feel it. My son was out there. He was just waiting for us. I remember a friend talking me down from many a ledge as I vented my frustration with where God had us. Once again it wasn't about me. Even this was for our good and His glory.

My sorrow was short lived. I knew the one who owned it all and even through this trial I KNEW God had called us to adopt. He wouldn't abandon us now. Even in this HE had a plan. HE knew the end of the story. I was simply to trust. Walk. Obey. We did. We waited. We prayed. We waited some more. Davids severance package would only last so long. His prior company had denied his already earned bonus for the quarter laying him off just days before he was supposed to receive that check. I struggled not to be angry. I spent many hours giving our situation to the Lord. Then I took it back. Then humbly I'd lay it at His feet again. Repeat. It was constant.

Our I171H arrived, it was a bit anti-climatic as I tried to be happy. It sat in the envelope a few days, it wasn't the fairytale golden ticket moment I'd always imagined. I eventually got out of my funk. We submitted our dossier in faith that the Lord would provide the remaining funds needed. We applied to Show Hope for a grant because we didn't feel we had many other options.

The phone rang one morning. Caller ID let me know it was the ex-company that at that point I still wasn't real happy with. However, I did adore the HR gal so I answered sweetly. She asked how I was doing and if David had a job. I cheerfully answered no but that we were fine. She sounded happy so I thought maybe there had been some mistake and they had "accidentally" laid my husband off and they were calling to let us know this was all a big joke. Maybe our nightmare was over. David got on the phone and all I could hear was a whole lot of "uh huhs" and "okays" and he seemed a bit shocked. So hey it could happen right? They could have realized their grave mistake in laying off my rock star husband right? No not really the case but remember that bonus they had said they weren't giving him? They had a change of heart and it was now sitting in our bank account. True story. Only God. Another small detail is that the bonus amount was almost exactly what our referral fee would be. We withdrew our application to Show Hope. The Lord had provided in another way and we didn't want to take from another family that needed a grant more then us.

October 2007 - David got a new job, one month to the day since his layoff. Only God.

More to come......

The American Dream. Our Call To Adopt. Part 1.

I've been challenged by a friend for awhile to write our adoption story. I laughed it off and frankly thought there was no way. While I'm open about who I am and it doesn't take long to figure out where I stand on things I have trust issues. I don't trust easily and sharing our story would mean taking off another layer of vulnerability because while I don't really care what people think of me I'm opening myself up to peoples opinions of my precious family. The ones I love deeply, fight for with intensity, and cherish dearly. However, the Lord has been prodding my heart to get ready to write. We've only shared our entire story with a few people because it is so personal to us. However the Lord asked me if I'd share if He asked me to. Of course I would. That time is here.

So here it is. Imperfect. Not always eloquent. Raw.

In 2007 when the Lord called us to adopt Silas I had no idea what kind of life changing process that would be. I'd always wanted to adopt since I was a very young girl, it was part of my DNA. David knew that before we got married he was open to it but he wasn't there yet. When the Lord got a hold of his heart and we began the process neither of us knew what was in store.

Lets go back a bit. God moved us from Oregon to Arizona in the summer of 2004. We built our then "dream home" in a family friendly city, had the perfect little family, three kids, two nice cars, a perfectly furnished house, a swimming pool, it was THE American Dream. At least we were headed in that general direction.

I was in a car accident with all of the kids in the summer of 2005. It was a very unpleasant experience, we ended up having to get a lawyer which is so not my speed. We lived day by day waiting for the call to let us know just how much we'd owe for medical bills, car rentals, car repairs, etc.

The housing market sky rocketed, our house was now worth twice what we paid and it seemed silly not to "upgrade" since completed houses were going so much higher then houses to build, you know because we live in a NOW society. So we did what any normal person would do. We put our house up for sale and began to build our REAL Dream home. A 3900 sq ft "modest" home on a 1/3 acre in a great neighborhood. Now we'd have room for guests to be extra comfortable, no more two car garage, now we'd have a 3.5 car garage. Life was perfect. In our own eyes. (let me just say, there is NOTHING wrong with big houses, fast cars, and great neighborhoods. Don't get me wrong there is NOTHING wrong with this. BUT for us it was a problem, or should I say it became a problem as the Lord opened our eyes to His plan for us.)

During the time we were building our "REAL dream home" the Lord called us to adopt. Not only did He call us to adopt He asked if we'd be willing to give up everything to follow His call. Sure! Couldn't be that hard, yeah we could cut our grocery bill, I committed to giving up Starbucks, I could work a little more, yeah I'll sacrifice. But what about our dream house? Would we give that up? Would we pull our house off the market, back out of the DREAM house and live contented lives in our "almost dream house"? Through much prayer, fasting, and laying bare before the Lord David and I both knew what the Lord was calling us to do. We committed to adopting, took the house off the market, backed out of the new house, and settled in for a life changing experience.